I've titled this artistic Tour de France "3 Sumos and a Taxi," in loose reference to that classic 1987 Tom Selleck, Steve Guttenburg and Ted Danson comedy of a similar name. Three sumos and a taxi, however are far less comical. For starters, how is the
driver supposed to feel? He could have driven a dozen pianos worth of
elephants across the Serengeti with less damage to his suspension. In this tense sumo / taxi standoff, the driver actually argued with these fleshbeasts over the fare - one of the first things you learn in cabbie college is to never, never argue with a sumo over such petty things as cash or honor.
Another point of interest, all three sumos emerged from the backseat. How was it decided that the middle sumo rode bitch? Did they have an adhoc sumo battle at the taxi stand to determine who got window? And as they were on their way to an important sumo tournament, does this unnecessarily wear out their lumpy sumo legs?
Almost everything about the above, entirely true, scenario defies the laws of physics and the U.N.
Sir Isaac Newton and Captain Kofi Anon must be rolling in their graves.
3 comments:
Hmm...this could be a still shot from the Japanese re-make of _DC Cab_. I bet if Mr. T were driving that cab, he would've gotten his fare and then some!
Mr. T vs. these three sumos would be the event of the year. Colin: start asking around every sumo you see if they have a couple of friends who'd be interested. Dangle candy in front of them for motivation. Nut check the detractors and run in tight, taunting circles around them while they grab at you in vain.
Did you happen to ask them why they're wearing those silly dresses? And those white flip-flops-- Gap, I assume?
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