Like Japanese toilets or Japanese children, Japanese pigeons are self-sufficient and advanced. Unlike our American pigeons, Japanese pigeons fend for themselves and are just fine without your help, thank you very much.

So don't let me catch you feeding the pigeons in Tokyo. That would be setting back pigeon evolution by depressing their homing instincts and turning them into dirty scavenging air rats instead of the beautiful and rare specimens that they so clearly are.